Salaaaaams everyone! It's 00:11 and i'm back. i thought i would go straight to bed tonight - even fell asleep on the underground - but my mum offered to make me green tea (i'm not really a huge fan of normal tea) and i accepted. waiting for it to cool down, so thought i would grab this opportunity!
Last time i wrote about how i was sure that if i found the right person, then marriage would definitely be the right step. Now all that was missing was that person... mmmm, green tea with honey really is nice you know, aah... alhamdulillah!
Right, back on track! Okay, so this condition of mine (with my soul yearning and my heart seeking God's help through Ahlulbayt) continued for some months. During this time, i remember telling my dad. Unfortunately, till quite recently i wasn't too close to my dad. And that was my fault. However, some time back i asked Allah to replace my anger with mercy, my harshness with kindness and to make me a mercy to my parents and not a punishment. And brothers and sisters, how can Allah reject such a du'a? Ask from your heart... He will answer you.
i remember it was on a drive down back to our house in London (with my dad driving and me in the front passenger seat). No one else was in the car. It was night, on the motorway. i thought i should tell my dad about my desire to get married because as i mentioned it was my biggest wish at the time, and something that my heart was really pulling me towards. So i told him... awkward times! i don't remember exactly how i brought it about but it was one of the ones where you gradually bring it up to soothe them into it -lol!- rather than the abrupt ones, if you know what i mean! He listened as i was speaking, and then i asked him if he knew anyone though i doubted he would do. He was surprised that i asked him - he said: 'me?' and i said yeah :) but he didn't know anyone.
With my mum it was different, because i've always been really close with her since childhood. She already knew that i did want to marry early and mashaAllah i've been blessed with a mother that has always supported me every step of the way in this regard. In fact, not only was she okay with it, she was overjoyed that her son would want to follow the guidelines of Islam, all of which are, of course, in complete harmony with human nature (Fitrah).
For those of you who know me, i've probably mentioned to you that a lot of my mum's family live in Germany. Because of this, i go there from time to time, to visit my family. As one of my uncles is quite active in the community there, arranging spiritual programs for Muslim youth in the German language, they have a really tight group of friends. Due to sleep overs and spending time with them, some of the brothers i met there have become some of the few true friends that i do have. The sincerity, piety and love i have seen in them... is something no words can do justice to.
Anyway, i knew this one brother who was really well known amongst the Muslim community there, a brother who had helped me previously by listening to all the emotions that i had bottled inside me at a previous time of depression, who had been like a brother to me; he never spoke down to me, but came down to my level. He never shouted at me, even when others had done. He sympathized with me, he seemed to understand... as such, i was completely open to him about everything. Even though we didn't speak regularly or anything but i always felt that there was nothing i couldn't speak to him about.
Apart from my parents, he was the only person i really approached about this. i knew that due to Islamic activism he knew a lot of practicing sisters as well as brothers, because all of the programs arranged included sisters as well as brothers. So i asked him if he knew any sisters who he thought would be compatible for me to consider. This was whilst speaking on the phone - i was at our house in London at the time. He came back to me asap and told me that he knew three sisters! Allahu Akbar! Allahu Akbar! LOL!!!
He mentioned that one of the sisters would want to continue her education before 'tying the knot'. However another sister wanted to get married as soon as possible, as i did. Also, he said that this particular sister seemed to have similar ideas to me, and we seemed somewhat similar. Because you have to start somewhere, i said that yes i would like to be in contact with her when i was asked if my email could be given to her and hers to mine for us to speak directly.
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